Demon Pistols and Death
by Insect
Summary: Kid's first encounter with Liz and Patty.
1. Chapter 1

It was Kid's night out. Every Friday he went out with friends, at least that's what everyone thought. He was out on the streets, wandering, wondering what to do about himself. Being a god, he could do whatever he wanted, get whatever weapon. No one understood him; OCD over symmetry was a tough thing. Kid quickly ran across the street, over a taxi, around an eighteen-wheeler and straightened a man's tie who was about to get lucky with a girl.

"HEY!" screamed the man. The prostitute backed away, sneaking fifty dollars into her breast pocket. The man stepped out and tried to punch Kid but he ducked japed and left the unconscious man in the car and left.

Everyone left a 20 foot radius around him. As he walked on the side walk he was snatched from an ally way. "Kid, nice suit." said a tall, dark golden haired girl with a frumpy jacket and a cigarette sagging out of her mouth. A cold, metallic pistol was pressed against his temple. He glanced at the pistol then the girl. He wiped a smudge off the pistol with his handkerchief. The girls smile lowered slightly and the giggling from the pistol stopped.

"What's with you" said the girl. She seemed wary of what to do. "Check his pockets." said the pistol, starting the giggling again. She shoved her hands down his pockets. "I don't carry money." said Kid. He raised his hand and contemplated moving the cigarette or removing it. He smacked it out of her mouth. She gasped and punched his stomach.

He wasn't ready. He returned knocking the pistol from her hands and punching her seven times but an eighth was sent directly into her ribcage which sent her across the small alley. "Strong kid." said the girl. She picked up the pistol and shot. The purple bullet made a singe mark in the wall next to his head. He ran at them. As he punched her, she snickered and transformed and the other pistol changed into a short, blond and had a huge smile. He was in shock.

Two? Even? Pair? SYMMETRICAL! He seemed in extreme glee. The girls looked at one another. He was hoping up and down. "I finally found!" said Kid. He was looking at them with shiny eyes. The girl shot him in the foot. He jumped again. He glared at them. "Patty! Shoot him!" said the gun. "Sorry!" said Patty. The two girls turned and stood to look at him he kicked both of them in the throat. The girls never saw him. They were wheezing. Their breath was raspy and smelled like weed and marijuana.

He stood in front of them. He leaned really close to Patty. "Don't hurt her!" said the older girl putting herself in front of Patty. He brushed a spot off the older ones cheek and shifted the younger ones hair. The older one slapped his hand but he didn't care. "You two are perfect." said Kid. "What?" asked the older one. "Liz, I think he's high too!" said Patty smiling and circling her head, looking at the sky.

There was the noise of sirens and a police car was seen in the distance. "Please come with me." asked Kid getting on his knees. "Get up you pussy." said Liz, smiling. Kid looked up in confusion. "He seems to be unconscious." said a voice from outside the alley. Kid summoned a skateboard from his palm. He stepped on and held out his hands and beckoned to the girls.

"Are you coming?" asked Kid. "Well…" said Liz. "Come on! It'll be fun!" said Patty already turned into a pistol and resting in his palm. "There seem to be foot steps leading to this alley." said another voice. "GOT TO GO!" said Kid, kicking off from the floor. Liz transformed and joined the mysterious man in a suit. Not knowing what's coming next….


	2. Eight and The Moon Clan

"I got us a mission!" said Kid without knocking on Liz's door. Liz snatched her towel to cover up then slapped him across the face. He stumbled but didn't fall. "Knock you perve!" screamed Liz. "Sorry, not used to it. Living with other people." said Kid, he looked at his shoes. "It's okay." said Liz. She grabbed her clothes and stepped into the bathroom attached.

"I'll go tell Patty." said Kid. "Maybe she won't slap me." mumbled Kid. He strode down the hall. As he passed by a symmetrical painting, he glanced at it and continued walking. After eight seconds, he sprinted back pulled out a ruler and a protractor and adjusted it. Liz popped out her room and smiled at him.

He finally reached Patty's room and knocked eight times. She opened wearing short jean shorts, a small red tang top, a cowboy hat and a short white tie. She was smiling. "Hey Kid!" said Patty. "Hey." said Kid; he was adjusting her hat and tie.

Liz walked out her room and glared at Patty. "Why?" asked Liz, dropping her hands onto her hips. "It's stylish!" said Patty, flashing her outfit. "And symmetrical!" said Kid, he was admiring Liz… just Liz.

"Anyway, I got us a great first mission!" said Kid enthusiastically. "Why is it so great?" asked Liz. The trio started down the stairs. "There are eight kishin souls!" said Kid; he already had a choice of eight cereals set on the kitchen counter. Liz chose a high fiber low calorie cereal and Kid passed her the milk. Patty skipped down the stairs and pointed to the sweetest cereal in the row. Kid made himself four slices of peanut-butter and jam sandwiches. "You're going to eat all that!" said Liz astonished. "No for the trip." said Kid. He stuffed six slices into a bag and walked to the table. "Why are there eight place settings?" asked Patty; her legs were swinging back and forth under the table.

"In case of company." said Kid, taking the first bite of the slices. "Where's the mission?" asked Liz, her cereal seemed bland and tasteless. "Europe, specifically Spain." said Kid. "I love Spain!" said Patty, "They speak Spanish!" Kid face-palmed but Liz took no notice of her statement. "Who are we fighting?" asked Liz, he usually asked the questions. "A group of eight serial killers. The Moon Clan." said Kid. "Don't you mean Star Clan?" asked Liz. "Nope. The Star Clan has nine members." said Kid, he seemed disgusted.

"So when do we leave?" asked Liz. She got up picked up her bowl and Patty's and brought them to the sink. "Around eight o-clock." said Kid, he pulled back the cuff of his suit and checked his watch. "In exactly eight minutes." said Kid smiling.

It was dark and stormy; the tree shook in the wind. Kid was sitting watching the eight killers with tattoos of moons on them and writing down notes. Liz was on another branch trying to keep Patty quiet. "Why are you just watching them die?" asked Liz infuriated. "Minute… they hunt in eight, kill eight, eat the soul immediately…" he was writing quick notes. Liz shook him and asked again. "You might want to go save Patty rather than yell at me." said Kid. "What?" asked Liz. She turned around to see Patty who was down at the village picking up human souls and running. The Moon Clan were on her heels. "Damn." said Kid. Kid got up at safe locked the souls so no one can touch them unless he's dead.

The Moon Clan's kishin tongues were licking the air around. "Liz, Patty!" said Kid. Liz and Patty turned into pistols. Instead of fighting, Kid shot his skateboard out of his hand and left. "Hey!" yelled Liz. "We need to think of strategy." said Kid. They left the village to the eight blood thirsty killers behind.

"We need to go back." said Liz. They were in a large tent far outside the village. They were eating caviar and calamari, it was sea food day. "I know, stop nagging." said Kid. They sat down to enjoy the meal. There were still eight seating places. Liz ignored it. "We will head down later tonight." said Kid.

"Let's hope there not all dead." said Liz somberly. Patty was paying absolutely no attention to anything around her, even the fact that the calamari was squirming away… with eight legs.

The village was quiet and somber. There was nothing in sight; the windows were shatters, the doors wide open and no souls. They slowly checked every house. It was empty until the final house. There was a tall, lanky man with a crescent moon on his jacket was leaning over a soul. The soul appeared to be one of a little girl. Her body was under the soul it was untouched except the heart. It was taken out.

Two purple bullets hit the killer in the back. He was singed. He turned around; his longue pointed tongue was pointing out of his mouth and he was licking his lips. He lunged at him. He blocked but got a little cut. The killer was wielding two small katanas with black blades. He seemed to be on the verge of being kishin.

Kid shot at him but he dodged and countered. Kid was hurt but kept fighting. Kid went on two knees and charged Liz and Patty. "What are you doing Kid?" asked Liz. The two pistols were turning into large cannons. "I'm trying something." said Kid; his voice was trembling with the effort.

The killer had forgotten about them and went back to his soul. The killer was poking at it and eventually picked it up. After eight seconds the cannons were charged. At four seconds mark the killer heard. "Four, three, two and one. Ready to fire!" said Liz and Patty. Three rings went up each cannon simultaneously and they shot hard, murdering, purple bullets at him. An immense hole was made in the wall and two souls were floating next to one another. Liz and Patty ate their first kishin soul. Ever.

They trekked to camp. They were very excited for their first soul. "YAY!" yelled Patty. "First of many!" said Liz. "There were eight now seven." said Kid. The camp was light with eighty candles and they celebrated until they all collapsed.

The next morning Kid woke up strung to a wall. "Hey!" yelled Kid at a small man in the corner. Liz and Patty were still asleep soundly. The little man stood. He had a star on his forehead, he was wearing a black suit, a white tie but his hands were the size of three heads. "I must commemorate this occasion." said the little man. He walked to Kid and dropped eight roses. "Give them to your friends when they wake. I want them to feel welcome." said the little man as he left.

Kid glared at him as beads of sweat dripped down his brow. The man opened the white door and left. The room was white and had no decoration but had one small window. Just small enough for a human. "Liz, Patty wake up!" cried Kid. Liz and Patty's heads rose. "Here." said Kid he passed them the roses. "Pretty!" said Patty. "Where are we?" asked Liz. "It doesn't matter" said Kid. The three were alone in room.

The little man felt proud and was walking through the town as happy as a clam. He walked to a falling down building. "I caught them!" said the man. No one heard him because no one was there.

The man looked around and was confused. "Wait…" said the man. He left the house then walked into the next house on the left. He opened the door. He suddenly was suspended by his foot. "HEY!" yelled the man. He looked around the room. A tall man hopped up from the corner and did his happy dance. "YAY, YAY, YAY!" said the tall man. "Shred! It's me!" said the little man. "Oh, sorry bro." said Shred suddenly turning sad. Shred untied his brother. "I thought you were the boy and the guns." said Shred. The little man fell to floor rubbing his head. "Anyway, I have them! You owe me eight souls!" said the little man smiling. "Damn!" said Shred. "Where are they?" asked Shred.

"In the shed." said the little man. "Um, James, I think Crim is there." said Shred turning worried. "Oh, no!" said James.

Kid, Liz and Patty were still sitting there but something was different. A person crawled in through the window. He was fat but slid through the bars. "Oh look, the spider got caught in the fly's web." said Crim. "Um… wouldn't it be the fly got caught in the spider's web." said Kid nocking the roses behind him. "Oh, anyway." said Crim. Crim flashed in front of Patty and his slobber dripped in front of her. Kid plunked a thorn of the rose and started to cut the ropes tied around Liz. "Get him." said Kid when he finished.

"What?" said Crim. Liz jumped tripped Crim and pinned him to the floor. "You son of a bitch!" said Liz. She punched him in the face until Kid untied himself and Patty. "Liz, Patty!" yelled Kid. Liz and Patty turned into pistols and landed in his hands. He put them to his temples and pulled the triggers. Crim's head exploded. "There we go." said Kid.

The door opened and the two brothers sighed. "We shouldn't have let him stay with us." said James. Shred landed a punch to Kid's cheek before Kid could react. Kid fell but he shot James in the foot. "OW!" yelled James and he stumbled and fell on Shred. They fell to the floor. "Get up!" yelled Shred all three of the stood. Kid shot at Shred but hit James once again. "Damn!" said James and slid under Shred's legs but Kid jumped and Shred punched him in the gut.

Shred seemed to be a great fighter and James seemed to be an average opponent. Kid pistol whipped both of them when they stood and they fell and Shred's head fell off. Shred's body picked up the head replaced it on his head. "Oh, this isn't good." said Kid. James stood. "Yep, a robot brother. Only one way to kill him and it's not the head." said James smiling. Kid seemed worried but then seemed angry. "Both of you are a symmetrical. Can any of you people be symmetrical!" yelled Kid.

He stood kicked James in the chest and brought his heel down on Shred's shoulder and his arm fell off. Shred punched Kid again and grabbed Patty out of his hands. "Kid!" said Patty. "No!" said Liz and Kid. "Wait. IT TALKED!" said Shred and dropped her. "Wow, you didn't know they were people." said James as he stood.

Kid jumped on Shred's shoulders but also caught Patty as she fell. He plunged Liz through Shred's chest. Shred had been defeated. Now there were two dead bodies and one kishin soul. "Well, he had that coming." said James. "So do you." said Kid. He ran up to James but got tripped and landed in a mud pile. He pulled his head out of the mud. He spat at James and shot at him eight times but he wasn't there he moved like lightning behind Kid and shoved Kid's head even deeper into the mud.

Kid couldn't breathe. His arms were flailing. Liz and Patty turned back into their human forms and tackled James to the ground. "Patty, hold him." said Liz. "Okay!" said Patty seeming excited. Liz went to Kid and helped him out of the mud. Kid got up and walked over to James. "Patty move." said Kid. Patty move, she sensed Kid was mad. When Patty moved Kid plunged his fists through his brain. Kid stood up once more. "Only four left." said Kid as he walked. Eight drips of blood fell from Kid's hand. Liz and Patty gathered the souls and followed.

They headed back to camp after a long day.


End file.
